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Blossoming

blossoming
blos·som(blŏs′əm)n.
1. A flower or cluster of flowers.
2. The condition or time of flowering: peach trees in blossom.
3. A condition or period of maximum development.

intr.v.blos·somed, blos·som·ing, blos·soms
1. To come into flower; bloom.
2. To develop; flourish: The child blossomed into a beauty.

From The Free Dictionary

My word for the year in 2014 was ‘blossoming’.When you choose a word for the year, it’s about intent. Though sometimes as the year evolves, you can forget about this intent, sometimes even forget the word itself as busyness overtakes. But somehow this intent weaves its subtle way and the results might not be exactly as you thought.On the surface, last year didn’t feel like a year of blossoming. It felt more like a year of ploughing, preparation, perspiration and intense hard work.

But looking at the definition: “a condition or period of maximum development”, “producing flowers”, it’s possible that this was the underlying development phase of fruits and flowers to come, the value of which might be better understood in hindsight at a much later date. Blossoms won’t happen without this work, this preparation for the future, this investment in growth.

Reflecting further, I see that the blossoming may in fact have been very long term and much deeper than I realise.

Before my daughter was born, I had a journal called “Blossoming”. Clearly it’s a key recurring word for me. I had forgotten this journal, this title I gave it so long ago and the intent established at that time now 22 years ago. I only remembered this and made the link very recently. In there, I write:

“The next phase is one of blossoming, flowering, preparing for bearing fruit.”

In just over a year from writing those words, I gave birth to my beautiful daughter.And for much of this past year, she has lived in Japan, studying, living independently and so happily, developing her already excellent Japanese language skills, travelling, interacting, learning, making many new friends, thriving and growing into the most beautiful woman I am so proud of. Watching this blossoming mostly from afar has been the greatest achievement of 2014, if hard at times because of distance. This letting go also part of my own growth.

I read these lovely words recently which exactly capture the sense of my growth through my daughter:

“I am from my daughter. She gave birth to the woman I am, as much as I gave birth to her entire being. Definitely not a mainstream way of looking at motherhood. But it’s true. I would not be the woman I am today were it not for her existence and her own kind of wisdom”

From “Up to my knees in the writing waters

So not so much my own blossoming and achievement, much more my daughter’s this past year, with her growth and flowering becoming my growth and flowering: the longest term of blossoming and the deepest expression of love. A precious realisation.

blossoms